Rolling solo is the New Happy — Why People are Jumping Off the Relationship Bandwagon at Singlesville

Since Adam fist took a bite of that damned apple, single people have been looked at as the lepers of society. If you are single it’s assumed something’s wrong with you, because it’s never been cool to be consciously single — until now.

Previously the only single people were the crazy cat lady or the guy who was too wild to “settle down,” but it turns out they were actually on to something. It’s called happiness.

As a matter of fact, it’s becoming cool now as Nicki Minaj, Drew Barrymore, Pauley Perrette, Mindy Kaling, and dozens of other celebrities have publicly embraced singlehood. But what is it exactly that makes being single such a welcome change to being in a couple?

Once you get past the social conditioning and stigma that says if you’re single something MUST be wrong with you, you’re free to discover a whole new world that revolves around you. Isn’t that what everyone ultimately wants anyway?

Being single gives you time to have a deeper relationship with yourself, to understand at a much deeper level what makes you happy, AND the ability to go after it.

Being one of two requires you put in time and effort into your partners wants and desires, and spend time with their friends and support their interests. When you’re solo, you get to put that time and energy into yourself.

Selfish much?

Many people confuse being consciously single with being selfish, but you can be selfish with a whole group of people, and you can be loving and giving on your own.

Many people in relationships make the other person their sole focus, limiting their own experiences and opportunities for growth and learning. When you’re solo, you are free to focus on anything, or anyone you like.

Successful solos tend to have a strong circle of friends for support and entertainment that expands their potential for adventure, fun, and fulfillment. If you are open to engaging with several people rather than just one, your entire world can be open to new possibilities for growth and awareness. Having a mate can squash such opportunities if your mate is jealous, fears abandonment, or is just plain boring.

Being with yourself allows you time to focus all your energies on your pursuits and interests, whether it be your career, hobbies, or discovering new passions.

Your time is your own and you are free to spend it as you choose.

Oftentimes when people review past relationships they realize none lived up to their expectations or desires. They grow to understand that all those areas can actually be filled with several different people each filling a specific niche. How cool is that? Why settle for one when you can have five?

I’ve always said the perfect man is a compilation of 4 or 5 of the men I’ve dated, and now I’m free to engage with each of those types without being tied to any one of them. Just because you’re single does not mean you’re alone. It’s really brilliant when you think about it.

One stop shopping may work for Wal-Mart or Amazon, but when you’re shopping for happiness, it’s best to shop at several stores.

The most important piece of the happiness puzzle is taking time to create the life you desire, on your own. If it’s yours, no one can ever take it away.

If at some point a special person comes into your life, they come into a full life with the understanding that this is your life, and it will continue to be your life. They may join you or be supportive and watch from the sidelines, but your happiness is not up for debate or distraction. The life you have created is the one you desire, with or without somebody else in it.

Many people are in love with the idea of being in love and will do anything to be with someone they feel can provide that feeling of stability and security. They believe that being solo means you don’t have love in your life, but that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

Being in love doesn’t have anything to do with another person. Being in love reflects your relationship with yourself and the life you create.

I’d proud to say I’m in love — with my life! And that’s a relationship I can say “I do” to, forever.